Unilever job cuts, fried chicken, and Taylor Swift versus the Bank of England

Newsletter Issue #15

Rise Up is a weekly newsletter with can’t-miss headlines on consumer brands, marketing, startups, ventures, tech, and happiness.

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Weekly Exhale: School’s Out

It's the end-of-year school assembly. The guest speaker is a retired specialist teacher—a cross between Carl Freidicksen from the Pixar movie UP and Colin Firth. It's early evening, and he produces a can of jellied dog food he's mistakenly packed. "I'm terribly sorry, but I'm just so hungry," he says, cracking open the can and shovelling in a big mouthful.

"Bleuuuuurrgghhhhhhh!" the audience shrills in delighted disgust.

It's only fair that a teacher enjoys a spoonful, too. Eventually, a trainee teacher plucks up the courage and takes her punishment. Now it's time for one of the kids to have a go, and they all throw their hands in the air, desperate to be picked.

The can turns out to contain Mars bars blended with strawberry jelly. Given today's political and social media and AI, the lesson is that children must question everything before them.

As an aside, I've resented dropping my son off at primary school for seven years. It's a pain. Now he's going to a big school, and I'm finally relieved of my duties.

But emotions clasped my throat as we approached the school yesterday. "I'm proud of you", I blurted out, thinking of the times his little hand would reach up to mine in a magical connection as we walked and talked together.

"Bye, Dad," he said, disappearing through the junior school gates for the last time.

Let's rise together with every issue. 🧡

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Market Movements

UK's grew more than expected again in May | The Guardian

Taylor Swift versus the Bank of England | FT

Goldman Sachs: AI will not save the UK economy | City AM

Brand Beat

Apple Vision Pro launches in Europe today | Fast Company

Unilever to slash a third of office jobs | FT

Ellie Goulding's ready-to-drink Served unveils advertising push | The Grocer

Starbucks caffeinates local economies | The Economist

Burberry preparing to cut hundreds of jobs | Business of Fashion

Timpson's boss appointed as Prison Minister | The Retail Bulletin

How fried chicken took over the British high street | The Times

Microsoft's ad tech is breaking EU law | Yahoo!

'Share of model': the next AI nonsense burger for marketing? | Marketing Week

Carpetright closes: 1,800 jobs at risk | BBC

Taco Bell opens a retirement community | Fast Company

→ Trending: Wellah natural wellness for women everyday | Thingtesting

Startup Spotlight

America's biggest non-alcoholic beer just doubled its valuation | Fortune

How to break up with your co-founder | Sifted

Co-founder of UK unicorn Wayve invest in ocean robots | The Next Web

A start-up set out to fight climate by helping plumbers | Techcrunch

Tech Tidbits

How the UK can become a global software leader, five quick wins | Sifted

I will piledrive you if you mention AI again | Ludic Mataroa

Elon Musk's Neuralink is ready to implant its second volunteer | Wired

Venture Vibes

Paramount Global and Skydance agree to merge | The Wall Street Journal

European venture investing review for H1 2024 in full | Sifted

The return of crypto venture capital | FT

Alpine closes first fund bringing space exploration to Europe | Techcrunch

Design Driven

How Figma built the design for its Config Conference | It's Nice That

Paramount tries to Skydance its logo, and the result is bad | Newscast Studio

This plastic-free recyclable speaker looks like a sculpture | Fast Company

The un-branding of Abercrombie & Fitch | The Cut

Hello, Happiness

Can tech calm down and respect our humanity? | Eric Athas

Don't trust how you feel about life after 9 pm | Sextras

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I hope the Summer has kicked off beautifully for you. Substack distributes this newsletter; as a subscriber, you can message me anytime using the link below.

Stay gold 🙏🏻